8.21.2010

Why do guys get a hard-on for fantasy football?

This time of the year I field numerous requests to be the "Vanna White" of fantasy football drafts. What is my pay you ask? ...... Why Guinness of course....why, what were you thinking?

The guys in my life (bf's, fb's, co-workers, work husbands, what have you) get sooooo pumped up/slightly psycho/definitely feverish around this time of year. It has become apparent that their draft picks for their fantasy league are more important and precious to them than [fill in the blank]. Goobers, they are.

I participated in ONE fantasy football league ONE time, 2006. I was called one sultry Floridian August afternoon and asked by my co-worker if I wanted to play. I protested out of lack of knowledge of the rules, operation and protocol of such an entity but he assured me, "no experience necessary." I'm thinking he's underestimating me :) After having a half hour to be prepare for the dumpy draft and being ridiculed for picking Eli Manning and a defense in early rounds, I ended up winning that year--how thsuper/funny/good times that is. There were numerous reasons I liked playing the oddly addicting beast that is fantasy football but there was one BIG reason I didn't like it that outshone everything else.....it ruined the game for me in a way. It took the fun out of watching on the weekends, rooting for the players and teams I truly liked. Instead I was only cheering for the players I put into my lineup that week. I was wishing physical harm on the players included on my opponent's roster. Worst of all I would be physically ill if I started a player that was doing awful and benched the replacement who was having the best Sunday of his career. I got really into and couldn't take it....I realized that watching football and participating in the season's various festivities had lost its charm and playfulness. It wasn't the same gloriousness and I haven't played since. Besides, I want to keep my record of 1-0.

totes
:)

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